This is novel.
My sisters been wanting me to visit over Christmas for years. I have always refused coz of...well you know.
She lives about 200 miles away, several trains, a couple of buses, some walking, some taxis and then dealing with a hotel for a few days, and that's just to get there (thought best as she has several active kids and has an extension being built, no free rooms, and I will need rest, quiet, can't really expect kids to be quiet and leave me alone over christmas if I was staying there, it wouldn't be fair to).
I need to speak her regarding something else, I actually need to see her but she has a family so her coming here, that's 2 days out of her life, near christmas.
So I'm going there, train tickets and hotel have been booked.
Obviously I have some trepidation, I have no idea if this is possible, I haven't done anything like this for approaching 30 years, and I have no idea how real this remission is, but I'm doing it, while I have the chance, I don't really care it could all go wrong.
Take that SW, the slightest sign of improvement and I'm doing stuff, doing what a month ago would have been impossible to even consider - and it's only possible coz I'm depressed as hell at the moment. What does that say about your ME perpetuation BPS BS!!
(If I disappear completely in the new year, you know why lol)
ETA - I'm eating a bit more, and sleeping more, I'm now up to about 4-5 hours every 2-3 nights, in one hit. I lost exactly 6lb this week, so whilst it's probably slowed a bit it's still bloody ridiculous considering I am still mostly just sitting or lying here, on the sofa, all day and night. The only bit of me that is more active is my brain, and that's not doing anything useful, just constantly replaying the same events at me, not the same version obviously, with minor alterations, what ifs. Over and over and again, uses a lot of time. Delusional. Pointless.
Obviously tho depression burns a lot more calories than people think. I'm not complaining. Although I am now lighter than I have been in at least 16 years I'm still 15 stone, I could do with shifting another 3 stone. Once that goes, if the weight is still dropping at anything like this rate, that's when I'll start to get concerned. Somewhere between 8 and 12 weeks, then I'll judge it.
Apart from that, I feel great, I'm trying new things, I'm just not actually achieving much.