???
We keep touching the stove. Again and again and again, no matter how many times we get burned. Even through increasingly severe burns that take longer to heal, we look longingly at the stove for the next time we get to touch it.
This captures my experience well. I know I should rest much more than I do, but I seem unable to most of the time.
Do your symptoms vary over periods of days or weeks
@Louie41 ? Does your illness play Snakes and Ladders? If not at all then maybe there is something different in your case?
Thank you so much, Jonathan, for asking these questions and for listening to us! I've found this whole discussion provocative and enlightening.
I seem to get PEM, but I question whether it is the cardinal symptom of ME/CFS. The sense of exhaustion is so complete for me that it obliterates my ability to understand how PEM could be so important. I do have periodic symptoms of sore throat, sleep reversal, and light, sound, and visual commotion intolerance. And cognitive issues that are hard to separate out because of age.
But to be honest, I have no sense that these occur after too much other activity of whatever sort. I suspect I haven't been paying enough attention to figure this out. I was 48 when first ill, was involved in many different activities, and I continue to be interested in a great many things. Because of my age of onset, I suspect I saw myself with a closing frame on my life--without much time for convalescence. I'm also a fighter, with a somewhat belligerent attitude about limitation in general. My efforts at pacing have been limited to a day or two in bed following a big event like the opera or going to the theater, and to putting quite stringent time boundaries around visits whenever possible. My dear husband and I continue to struggle with conversation. I'm so exhausted by leaving the house that I resist doing so. Thus many of my interests have fallen by the wayside.
It is possible that you are managing to keep at this particular level all these years. Are you resting lots each day? It wasn't until I reached very severe ME that PEM was without a doubt shouting its existence to me over and over. Its impact is forever imprinted.
See my comments on pacing above.
Just to add to this
@Louie41 It wasn't until I hit very severe ME that I was able to look back and recognize PEM in my earlier years. In my earlier years I was describing symptoms as unusual and ' something very wrong'.
And I thank you for your input,
@AliceLily. It has prompted me to think along some new lines.